Failure is an inevitable part of life its impact on your life depends on how you cope. If you accept, learn from and avoid defining yourself by your experience, you will grow and become stronger. I will cover the nature of failure and go over six steps to working through the difficulty of failing.
Steps to Working through Failure
1: Unhook - notice mental commentary. Journaling can be a useful tool for tracking your inner dialogue.
2: Make Space - expand around the pain of failure. Keep the experience in perspective, don't make it bigger than it is. Tell yourself multiple stories about it from a variety of perspectives.
3: Be Kind to Yourself - practice daily self-care. Tell the story of your experience as if you were talking to someone you love.
4: Appreciate what Worked and Any Improvements - Something, however small, worked. What was it? What actions can you take to improve your chances of doing better next time?
5: Find Something Useful - What did you learn from your experience? How can you use that to improve?
6: Take a Stand - what value are you wanting to ground yourself upon? How can you take action to support that value now?
Recommended Reading:
Being Wrong - Kathryn Shultz
Reality Slap - Russ Harris
Accepting and Rebounding from Failure