Value-Based Goals: How to Get the Results You Want Now
Value-based goals can be difficult, both in creating and following through. Further, the fact that they're difficult is itself a frustration because goals are what is believed to guide the direction of our lives. Rather like mileposts on a highway counting every iteration of a road well-traveled, goals are seen as the end point for life having moved forward. Goals are challenging, however, largely because of this framework. If we change the metaphorical framing to journey highlights, like stopping at viewing areas on a long drive, each step along the path can become its own means of measurement. Goals as end points undermines the steps to get complete them. By shifting your attention to the meaning and purpose provided by your Values, goals become a means of personal fulfillment through constant Value-based action.
We can keep using the travel metaphor to help us out. How often during a trip does the monotony of the distance start becoming an enemy all on its own? How frequently do you find yourself focused on the next mile marker, the next landmark, as a means of showing progress, only to finally arrive and feel exhausted? That feeling is due to having been so focused on reaching a particular destination that the purpose of getting there was lost, overshadowed by the minutiae of the process. This is like forgetting the forest because you're so focused on the trees. The more you focus on the iterative process of reaching a destination, the broader picture provided by big ideas, purposes, and meaning gets lost.
Shifting goals to align with a meaningful purpose can be done through a three-step process.
Select the Area of Your Life to See Change Within and Write Out Your Goal
Life can be seen through a lens of the roles that we embody. With that in mind, we can look at the roles we take in the areas of Work or School, Family (however that is defined by you), Community: friends, neighbors, social groups, and Self: mind, body, and spirit (from Leading the Life You Want by Stewart Friedman).
First, decide what area of your life you're looking to make a change in. Try to keep it to just one as much as possible, though any change will have ripple effects within the others.
Once you've decided, narrow that area down to a particular goal. For this, we can use the SMART acronym for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-sensitive. Selecting an area of your life first helps with being specific and relevant. Measurable makes it possible to track progress and know when you've arrived. Time-sensitive gives you a sense of urgency and an end-point to be aware of. Boundaries like these help us by providing structure for our thoughts and behavior so we aren't being flippant with our desires or casual with our actions. (Click here to download a SMART goal worksheet)
At first glance, the SMART structure look like going against the focus on Values, but this is about the mental framing for putting Values into practice. SMART, or any other goal framing model, is a type of story we make to fit the behavior we want to do. The behavior is still guided by how it serves your particular Values first.
Identify the Value the Change is Seeking to Serve
Values are the triggers that inspire us to act, both in outward behavior and inner emotional responses. To effect change in our lives, we want to identify particular behaviors with the Value we want to serve. In desiring to keep this simple, think of the area of your life that you want to see the change in, and reflect on what Values come to mind when you reflect on its importance. For instance, if it's Work or School, do the Values of Time-Management, Honesty, and/or Integrity show up? If it's Family, perhaps Love, Affection, or Trust arises. You can download the Value Pyramid worksheet on the Resources page as a way to find more specific words, and help in connecting the area for change to occur in with the Value(s) that inspire that change.
As you can see from the Values Pyramid worksheet, we all serve multiple Values at any given time. Quite often, the Behavior we choose to support one may end up undermining or not supporting another Value, at least in an ideal way. What's important to remember here is that this juggling act is part of everyday living. Selecting a single Value aligned with your goal provides an emotional match to see the goal through to completion. By remembering there are other Values vital to you, a broader awareness can be built that allows you to see around behavioral obstacles that get in the way of your value-based goal.
Measure Success through Every Instance of the Value-Directed Behavior
Lastly, when pursuing your value-based goal, recognize that Values are served in many different ways. Rather than keeping your eye only on goal completion as defined by a particular behavior, each and every step becomes a movement of Value, serving what matters to you. This allows you to remain aware of your surroundings, acknowledge the changes in your life that are happening in pursuit of your goal, and constantly reinforce your desire to reach it by thinking of yourself as aligned with the purpose you’ve decided on.
Value-directed behavior is a way to consistently reinforce your desire for success by connecting every behavior along the path to your eventual value-based goal. This is a recognition that every single one of us, in selecting a direction for our lives, starts with how we think of ourselves, the central story that we align with. Values are the bedrock of that story.
